Hi guys, I just quickly wanted to tell you about certain events in my life! Good and bad parts unfortunately.
It has been a while since I posted a life update, also because I usually add a quick update with my recipe posts. Sometimes I doubt on whether or not to include those personal stories, but then I remember that this is my blog and that I enjoy reading other peoples’ personal stories too! I read foodblogs only partially because I get inspired from the recipes: a large part is about enjoying stories, bits and pieces of the lives of others.
Anyway, this life update won’t be long. I’m currently at school after just following my only class and plan to go home soon, but wanted to enjoy a cappuccino first 🙂
Yep, as I mentioned a dozen times before I’m back to studying for real now. In just a few weeks time I will have the first 3 deadlines of papers: exciting! I’m very scared but also reaaaally willing to get this shit done.
I’ve started writing my Marketing paper (hotelschool student) and I think I’ve got a good start. It’s mainly just ideas and scraps of books and academic writing now: I’ve gotta turn it into an actual paper!
I had a brainstorm after class with the marketing lecture and this really helped a lot. We need to find a ‘customer orientation’ for the company we work with (I work with NH Hotels) and he helped me to see which direction to choose. Seriously, I would have chosen two orientations that he told me I should move away from! So I’m extremely glad I decided to pick up the courage and stay after class to ask some questions.
And oh, silly me. I work with weekly planners because I liiiike lists and I’ll go crazy if I don’t have an overview… Sound relatable? But anyway, I planned ahead until my deadlines and I found out last week I actually skipped a week. Oh my gosh! I thought I had only two weeks left and it’s actually three… GOOD MORNING!!
Okay, I have to admit I actually started writing this post to get this off my chest but I didn’t want to only share bad news. The thing is, my dear cat Mino is no longer with us and this makes me incredibly sad.
I have a lot of pictures from when he was this tinny tiny cat, as you can see above. He wasn’t even one year old yet, and on this picture I think he is probably two months? But the stupid thing is that I don’t have a lot of recent pictures. I always thought I could take so many more pictures of him because he still had so many more years to go!
I’ll quickly tell you what we think has happened. When Mino wasn’t inside he always lived in the barn, and he would walk across the bars at the highest part of the roof. We think he fell off for some unknown reason: Mino was always climbing like a little monkey! But he broke his leg and pelvis, so something must have gone wrong.
At first we heard that he broke his leg and that it would cost a lot of money, but that they could fix him in a way. He would have to stay in a cage for six weeks, which was already very sad! He was always running around and climbing in trees, so being locked up would make him very unhappy.
Later we heard that he also broke his pelvis and that they weren’t sure they could help him anymore. It was already too expensive to risk, and even though I nearly would have taken the money out of my savings account I know that would have been selfish in a way.
Even though I’m going to miss him like crazy I know that he would have been in a lot of pain if we tried to save him. And even if he wasn’t in pain he would have gone crazy from being locked up, so I guess it was the best solution for him to sleep forever.
Just because I understand that he couldn’t be saved doesn’t mean that this makes it any easier for me. I miss him every day, and see little reminders in every thing. He left his toys all around my bed! I’m not only going to miss Mino as happy and funny cat, but also as my buddy. With my anxiety and all I relied on him a lot when I was with my parents: I think pet owners can understand how much comfort a cat can bring.
Not only did he make me happy, I also really cheered up when he was around. With my anxiety I often have this feeling of being overwhelmed and my head bursting from all the information, so I would go upstairs and hide from the world for a while. This can be very lonely of course, but not when I had Mino around. You’re alone enough to unwind, but never lonely because I could just bury my face in Mino’s fur and listen to his purring or play with him. Mino never asked any questions!
I wanted to share this with you as it left me feeling very unmotivated at times. It happened last week on Tuesday, and I still struggle with it very often. I knew I was crazy about my little cat but never knew I would miss him this much! I’ll miss his ways and the support he gave me in a way. But I know he’s in a better place now, and hopefully he didn’t suffer for too long.
I know that being sad isn’t going to bring him back, but I’m learning to see that this mourning is very healthy. If you love something you’re going to be hurting when it’s gone, and that is okay. If I wouldn’t allow myself to be sad it would almost be as if Mino wasn’t worth it…. This is definitely a learning process for me, but I’m happy to remember Mino in his happy ways.
Luckily the last time I saw him was a good one. I was going to cycle to the city centre to see my friends and then I saw him sitting in the barn. Of course I couldn’t just leave without petting him, and I’m so happy I did! I kept thinking to myself “I’m going to have to cycle really fast to be on time if I don’t leave now.” But he was so happy to see me and he was purring like madness. So I stayed a little longer and even though I feel tears burning now that still makes me smile.